Finding purpose in Life

We all feel shitty at times. I don't mean physically here, but emotionally. Sometimes I wake up in the morning and I realize that there is nothing interesting or exciting to do for the day. It's going to be just a normal, nothing to get excited about kind of day. My first thought is more like a feeling of numbness or "so what?"

I would say that happens a lot, wake up, just a normal day, so what. I don't know if it is from reading good books, or trying hard to be like all of the great people in my life, but then a much better thought comes running calmly into my mind: I am here only to be truly helpful. That saying comes directly from A Course in Miracles. And right then and there it is as if someone flipped a switch on my emotions and I feel myself lift and look a my day from a whole other perspective.

When I am thinking about myself and making myself happier I do not get happier, I either get anxious--as in "what can I do now?"-- or I get depressed if I can't think of anything good to do. I don't know why but more and more, right away I remember that saying from the Course, and the my feelings change immediately. I think that may have a lot to do with me being happier now than at any time in my life--and there is nothing especially exciting going on to cause that.

Another aspect of this is highlighted by research done by UCLA psychologists. They are finding out that when we name our emotions, we calm ourselves down. This is believed to be one of the reasons that meditation is so beneficial. Mindfulness techniques help people to pay attention to what they are feeling, and in noticing these feelings, making them more explicit and aware of what is going on inside, those negative emotions tend to dissolve. Another good reason to take up a meditation practice.

This may be what is happening to me when I become aware of my morning feelings, only I move directly to something positive to fill the empty space of letting go of that emotion. Whatever it is, I plan on keep doing it--I like what is going on.

Asomatognosia: not seeing what is there

Asomatognosia is a neurological disorder where the patient does not recognize a part of his or her body as their own. For instance, it could be an arm. They see the arm, but don't believe it is theirs. When pointed out that it is attached to their body they would say something like, "You can't always believe what you see." Asomatognosia usually happens when there is damage to a part of the brain.

I am interested in this phenomenon because it involves perception and a particular inability to see what really is. I am hoping to develop a more holistic perspective in myself, but what if I have some kind of asomatognosia and I don't know it. What if there is something in my brain that does not let me see what is really there? And how would I know about it?

People who have this rare condition are convinced that these parts of their bodies are not there and if they are there they do not belong to them. We again have a case where reason is over-ridden by another factor. This time, instead of emotion, it is a brain lesion.

What if there is some kind of brain lesion, and it doesn't have to be a lesion, it could just be the way our brains are constructed, that does not let me see....God, for instance. Or miracles when they happen. Or that what we call coincidences that are really not coincidences at all. What if the whole world is not anything at all like we think it is. We could be living lives just like the mistaken patient!

I bring this up only so that we will consider that maybe the world is not the way we have always perceived it to be. Maybe it is something quite different. For a number of years now I have looked up at the moon and wondered: what a coincidence it is that it is exactly the same size in the sky as the sun, even though it is much smaller. Of course, the reason is that it is much closer to the earth. But still, an interesting coincidence. And I also wonder how it happens that the moon takes the same amount of time to circle the earth as it does to rotate around itself. In other words, its day is exactly equal to its year. That is why the same side faces us all the time. Another interesting coincidence. My question is: is my thought that it is a coincidence just my way of rationalizing (like those patients who have asomatognosia) or is there something weird going on in the sky and I just don't want to admit it?

Do we all suffer from existential asomatognosia?

Knowing and Believing

The human brain and the mind play tricks on us all the time. Most importantly, they really screw around with what we know, what we know we know, and what we think we know, and what we believe. (For vice-president Dick Chaney it's what we don't know and what we know we don't know.) Often, what we think we know is really only a belief. But, we can, with a little use of the mind, change a belief into a knowing.

What I know comes from my experience. I know that I am a little cold right now. That is not a belief, or a theory, I know it from my experience. I believe that it will be sunny today because the weatherman said so. Let's make this a little more interesting. I have a belief in a God type person, or being, or universal creative force, whatever. Why? Well, I have reasoned this all out, and my mind tells me that some thing, or some one is behind all the order and beauty of the universe.

Now isn't that interesting? My belief comes from a rational thought process.

My belief in this God person, however, does not give me that much consolation. It satisfies one part of my mind that needs to make sense of things, but it does not give me any emotional fulfillment. On the other hand, if I think about something that happened to me about 20 years ago, when I had what you would call a "spiritual" experience, when I felt God do something to me, that I know. I know that I had that experience, I know that it was beyond the physical universe, I know that what happened could only have happened if there were a being outside of the material world that I live in.

So here is a knowing that is actually more meaningful to me than my actual belief. I know I experienced this God event, but I only believe in a God person. What is more powerful, knowing or believing?

Where am I going with all this? The point is that what we know is more dependent on our experiences than on our rational thinking. Example: I have a close friend who does not believe that God can exist. Until she was 20 she believed in God. Then she experienced a terrible tragedy. Because of that event she "knows" that there is no God. How unrational is that? Guess what, we all do that in our own ways. We just do it differently.

The holistic perspective takes all of this into account. Keep in mind that what you know, you know from your experience, and that involves your emotions more than your rational brain. I think I would hold onto all of my "knowledge" a little less tightly. I'd look at my feelings a little more closely. For me, I want to know more than believe. I want to "feel" what it is that I really know. I'm going to spend a little more time (maybe a lot more time) feeling what it is that I know about this God experience. It is better to feel this Creative Intelligence that to believe in It (Him-Her).

Your brain is not a computer--it is hardwired to your emotions. Reason doesn't rule, guess what does.

Always a Struggle

It's seems like months since I have been trying to eat mostly (80%) raw foods. I can do vegan. I can do breakfast (smoothies) and lunch (salads, nuts, avocados) and feel healthy raw. But I reach for the starches (breads), the fats (butter-like spread), and the sweets (semi-sweet chocolate chips) at dinner-time or evening snack. Sometimes it's worse. And the end result is that even though I am not eating animal products, I've found a way to still put shit into my body!

This is so not easy. I swear to God it is a full-time commitment just eating healthy. I read tonight about a doctor telling the story of a man with elevated cholesterol. The man didn't want to go on statins to lower it and he had a heart attack. The doctor was selling his services--come to my office and let me give you the magic pill.

Of course, first the doctor told the patient to change his eating habits. So, you know what the man did? He stopped putting mayonnaise on his double bacon cheeseburgers. You'd think the doctor would have said that that wasn't really enough. I'd rather give up the crappy food than take the pills. Statins are know to cause liver and muscle damage.

So, tomorrow morning I will, I promise, take out my raw food books, get some inspiration, and eat in a way that honors my body.

(Can you hear the soft fan of my dehydrator making flax seed crackers? They've been drying all day. I wonder how tasty they will be?)

The Whole Story on Dairy Products

Here are some reasons to avoid dairy:

1. Cheese is a major source of dioxin in our diet (a prominent cause of cancer).

2. Cow's milk is designed to grow calves fast. Foods that promote fast growth cause cancer.

3. While milk itself contains calcium, the acid load from the animal protein can actually produce a negative balance because of loss through excretion. (Eskimos consume huge amounts of calcium from fish bones, but have the highest rates of hip-fracture because of all the animal protein.)

4. Milk produced on factory farms (nearly all milk) comes from cows that live miserable lives, not out in the pastures that the pictures would like us to think.

5. Drinking milk supports the veal industry. Male calves are sent to the veal factory farms. And you know what that means.

6. While fruits and veggies (especially green leafy ones) contain less calcium, our bodies retain more of it than from milk, creating a positive balance. (Populations that do not consume animal products have far lower rates of osteoporosis.)

Excellence in Sports--A Holistic Perspective

What makes a great athlete great? According to the hosts of the sports talk show on WEEI it is the ability to see the whole field, or the whole court. Talking about how great a basketball player LeBron James is, they pointed out that what made him so great is that he can see the whole playing court, see all that is going on, during the game.

The hosts then pointed out that that was what made Tom Brady, winner of three Super Bowls, such a great quarterback. Brady has the ability to see down the field and comprehend everything that is taking place in front of him. In a sense, it was pointed out, these men were able to slow things down enough to get a hold on what needed to be done.

I thought to myself when I heard this that if that isn't what having a holistic perspective is all about I don't know what is. In life, if we want to be winners, if we want to succeed, if we want to be all that we are meant to be, we must learn from these athletes the value of seeing the whole and not just the parts. We must widen our perspective and strive to see the whole playing field of life. The big question is--how do we do that? The answer has to do with personal development and growth.

Four Days in New York City

I just spent the last four days in New York City attending the PMA Publishing University Conference. Yikes! People are taking publishing back from the big New York publishing houses and producing books themselves. It is exciting to realize that individuals, even without a lot of financial resources, can get their ideas literally out across the entire planet.

There is no excuse for any writer to be shut out of the world-wide conversation. Books, articles, audio and visual presentations all can be made available either in print, plastic, or on the Internet, without a lot of money. I came away from the conference with a greater understanding of the whole book publishing process: writing, editing, production, and marketing. It all can be done by one person or a small team. So many possibilities, so little time (just kidding, we have the rest of our lives).

From a holistic perspective I must balance my enthusiasm to want to do everything with what I am best suited to do. I want to learn editing, book layout, web design, marketing, how to write better, manage a publishing house, acquire enlightenment...better stop there. Anyhow, I am determined to organize what I have learned and then do what is best for me to do.

Staying healthy in NYC was not as easy as I thought it would be. Instead of a great variety of food options, most of the restaurants repeated the same themes. I am glad to be back home where I can make my own fruit smoothies and salads the way I like them.

Okay, gotta go, lots to do! Power to the people!